Stranger Things 3 spoilers: Joyce's [blank] isn't in the [blank]

When it comes to niche genres, they don't get much smaller than the "games featuring Winona Rider" subsection of your local mom-and-pop video store. Other than a few small roles in various Beetlejuice games from the 1990s, she's basically a nonentity in the world of interactive fiction. 

She did have a bit part in the Stranger Things mobile app though, which was definitely a step in the right direction. The proof in that pudding? She's an actual playable character in Stranger Things 3: The Game. Not only that, but she's a powerhouse, cutting chains with a wire cutter and taking out thugs with a spinning lariat move like it's no big deal. 

Me being me, I took all this as potential evidence that Stranger Things 3: The Show would feature a GLOW crossover where Winona takes on all comers with a series of increasingly violent moves stolen directly from various Capcom characters. Sadly, the developers of the game told me that I shouldn't get my hopes up. In fact, the Stranger Things 3: The Game PAX demo was designed specifically NOT to contain any spoilers. It features an original scenario designed just to show off some gameplay. 

But they can't fool me. 

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